Good Damage

diane nguyen fails
to write down
her trauma memoir

I too want to put
my trauma
from thoughts into words

thoughts are too flimsy
words they are
more believable

she struggles to find
examples
of childhood trauma

she only thinks of
trivial
unkindness and drifts

so hard to focus
not to loose
yourself for many hours

not able to stop
unable
to get of of bed

starting is easy
but stopping
can take oh so long

even though the parts
may seem small
the sum is much worse

diane thinks writing
her memoir
turns her trauma good

but trauma just is
no meaning
no deeper reason

I don't want to be
though pretty
a fixed salad bowl

I just want the dreams
the terrors
to finally end

my one hope is that
the writing
helps calm the demons